Trying To Heal, Never To Forget

In the days following the Columbia disaster last February, former shuttle program manager Ron Dittemore was in front of the cameras, talking to reporters, briefing the world on recovery efforts and the investigation into what caused the shuttle to disintegrate as it re-entered the atmosphere one year ago on Sunday. Dittemore was perhaps the most senior NASA official to take the fall after that disaster. He now works in an aerospace job for a private company based in Utah.

Dittemore wonders why he didn't react more strongly when he saw a suitcase-sized chunk of insulating foam smack into Columbia's left wing about 80 seconds after lift-off on January 16th, 2003. "Why didn't the hair stand up on your neck?" he asks himself over and over again.

Dittemore was in front of the media hours after the tragedy. "There are a lot of things in this business that look like the smoking gun but turn out not even to be close,"

Four days later, when asked about that chunk of foam -- whether it could have played a part in the shuttle's demise -- he categorically denied it. Later, in interviews with investigators, he admitted he shouldn't have ruled out the possibility so quickly.

But the damage had been done. NASA Administrator Sean O'Keefe was red-faced angry at the quick dismissal of the "foamologist" theory. O'Keefe was just as angry at those who, in the early days following Columbia's destruction, insisted the foam, which impacted the shuttle wing at more than 500 mph, was indeed to blame. In short, he was angry that anyone would jumped to conclusions without all the facts. Dittemore later resigned from NASA.

The facts are in. The Columbia Accident Investigation Board (CAIB) ruled last summer that the foam impact appeared to have punctured the wing, allowing the superheated gasses generated during re-entry to penetrate the orbiter's wing, leading to the shuttle's disintegration.

Dittemore is a man haunted by the past.

"It doesn't get any easier as the time passes, because I still focus on seven families, and what did we miss to allow such a tragedy to occur," he says.

FMI: www.nasa.gov