"What Do I Care -- As Long As They Launch Over The Lake"

ANN 04.01.07 SPECIAL EDITION: In a move heralded by space enthusiasts and land-use advocates alike, on Sunday -- the fourth anniversary of the bulldozing of Meigs Field -- Chicago mayor Richard Daley signed a bill authorizing the creation of a commercial spaceport on the land once occupied by the hallowed general aviation airport.

"This way, we can attract attention to our noble city as a technological marvel -- and less a corrupt, mafia-inspired, Midwestern version of Brooklyn -- and bring in some big bucks as well," Daley said in an April 1 press conference.

"I admit, our city has felt a financial hit from losing the money pilots flying into Meigs used to spend when it was an airport," Daley added, almost as an afterthought. "OK, my bad. But I still say those little airplanes posed a clear and present danger to the security and safety of the citizens of this city!"

When one reporter pointed out the potential risk posed by speeding tubes filled with explosive rocket fuel, Daley shrugged. "What do I care? As long as they launch 'em over Lake Michigan, it's not my problem."

Set to open in 2010, the Richard Daley Commemorative Meigs Spaceport will sport two concrete reinforced launchpads, as well as an 8,000-foot runway for use by spacecraft similar to Virgin Galactic's SpaceShipTwo.

"But no airplanes!" Daley trumpted before being escorted to a lunch meeting by staffers. "I'll eat my tie before another airplane ever lands at Meigs!"

AOPA President Phil Boyer, in attendance at the news conference, promptly offered the mayor his tie, but his offer was gruffly declined.

FMI: www.daleyspaceport.com