President Binges on Big Macs

04.01.05 Special Edition: Just hours after President Bush had to abandon Air force One, in Idaho, after an inadvertent TFR violation, the small town of Saratoga Springs, Utah had a surprise visit from the Commander in Chief himself. Presidential helicopter 'Marine One' landed in the parking lot of the local McDonalds at approximately 1845 local time causing quite a stir in the neighborhood. Said Ida Garcia of the event “I was just about to pull in the parking lot to get my kids some dinner when the wind started picking up like crazy and all of a sudden I saw this huge black helicopter. It came out of no where, liked to scare me to death!”

The helicopter carried President Bush, 2 advisors and "at leat" 20 Secret Service agents. Marge Blossom overheard one of the advisors say the President had a taste for a value meal. Reportedly, President Bush and his entourage ordered 36 value meals -- including 2 of what is apparently the President’s favorite: the Big Mac.

John Keller, General Manager of the McDonalds, was surprised when the Secret Service agents entered his store, but had no comment. Apparently, Keller was advised not to tell anyone of the President’s unscheduled stop and given that the President’s last cholesterol test was almost 300, President Bush is afraid his wife would find out about his impromptu burger binges.

Of course, unspoken was the concern over public outcry similar to that which occured after Former President Clinton kept Air Force One on the tarmac, engines running, while he got a haircut. Keller confirms he was threatened by a secret service agent with a neuralizer, a pen-like device, but it was (allegedly) not used. Keller offers no further information, citing the possibility of return visit from the secret service.

FMI: www.presidentialmunchies.com