Thu, Apr 01, 2004
Agency Claims It Compromises Safety
After forcing airlines
to enact crazy policies that prohibit passengers from standing up
in airliners or waiting in line for the use of the toilet during
long-haul flights, the TSA has just enacted a new rule that would
prohibit passengers from complaining about the carrier's level of
service. The agency claims those that don't like typical airline
amenities like small seats, crabby flight attendants or lost
baggage are disturbing the peace and causing undue aggression. For
this reason, no passenger will be allowed to complain about airline
service at anytime commencing from the seat is purchased until bags
have been collected at the destination point.
"We must take this necessary step in the name of homeland
security," said Asa Hutchinson, Under Secretary for Border and
Transportation Security for the Department of Homeland Security.
"Hey, we can't have people complaining about the service. Imagine
the civil unrest that would cause within our transportation
system.
Hutchinson claims penalties for violating the latest salvo
against free speech, includes 30 days in federal prison and a
$10,000 fine for each complaint uttered in the presence of an
airline representative. Repeat offenders may face being blacklisted
on the DHS passenger system, which 98 percent of all law-abiding
Arab Americans already occupy.
In related news, US Attorney General has suggested that Congress
enact the "New England Patriot Act", where anyone caught wearing
football-related attire related to the New England team will be
detained for an unspecified period of time
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