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Sat, Apr 01, 2006

Heavenly: The Pope Learns To Fly

Copter Makes Even The Big Jobs Easier

04.01.06 'Special' Edition: The name on the airman certificate says Julius C Ratzinger, and he has private privileges in rotorcraft-helicopter. But you probably know him as Pope Benedict XVI (that's "the sixteenth," if you're not of the, er, Roman persuasion).

Yep. The world's newest helicopter pilot (shown above, shortly after passing his check ride) is also, I suppose you could say, CEO of a large international organization: the Catholic Church.

We heard that the Pope had gotten his initial flight training at Helicopter Adventurures International in the USA.  But HAI would neither confirm nor deny.

"We offer training for the helicopter pilot focused on career advancement. And we offer our students privacy if they want it. Is that clear?" We admitted it was, but decided to try to trick the spokesman when signing off.

"Dominus vobiscum"

"Et cum spirito -- HEY!"

While Pope John Paul II, who traveled the world, was known for his white Popemobile, Benedict, who has said he expects to stay closer to Rome, will likely become just as famous for his white Robinson R44, Vatican registration HV-BXVI, decorated with the papal seal.

"We're glad that he chose our helicopter," a Robinson official told Aero-News.

"He looked at the R22 also, but he couldn't fit that big hat he wears in there, not to mention the headset. The '44 was no problem. But we were really nervous when he met Frank. The Vatican guys were, too -- good guys, even if they dress funny in those red robes. But you see, no one had worked out the protocol on who was going to kiss who's ring. Fortunately, they just shook hands."

The Holy Father will use his new skills mostly to commute from his offices in Vatican City to his residence, Castel Gandolfo. Roman traffic is known for its epic snarls, and Pope Benedict now has the tools to escape them, not to mention the other hazards of commuting -- everything from accidents to road rage.

Not everyone in the Vatican's powerful bureaucracy, the Curia, is pleased with the Holy Father's decision.

"If God wanted man to fly," one Cardinal sniffed, when promised anonymity, "I say He would have given us rotors."

FMI: www.popebenedictxvifanclub.com

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