Asks For $250K, Apologies To Flock -- "But We Can Do Without Apologies"

ANN APRIL 1st "SPECIAL" EDITION: Saying the recent downing of a US Airways Airbus A320 following an inflight encounter with geese was "an avian tragedy unprecedented in the course of modern human events," on Wednesday the People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals filed suit in US District Court of New York against the airline for the "unwarranted slaughter, fricasseeing, slicing, dicing, julienning and barbequeing of at least four Canadian Geese."

As ANN reported, the A320 with 155 persons onboard had just taken off from New York's LaGuardia Airport on January 15 when its flight path conflicted with the track of a large flock of geese. Investigators have not yet determined how many birds were struck by the airliner... but PETA officials believe between 4-6 birds met their demise, most by passing through the rotating turbine disks of the airliner's twin CFM56-5B/P turbofans.

"There is no other way to say it -- the so-called "Miracle on the Hudson" was in truth a slaughter," said PETA spokeswoman Moonbeam Horowitz. "Those birds took flight that day with not a care in the world, their sole goal to fly around for a little bit in the manner Mother Nature intended.

"It's unconscionable such a tragedy has been lauded by the media, our elected officials -- even President Obama! -- as an inspiring event," Horowitz added. "What's more, we fear such popular support will only spur other pilots to attempt copycat acts."

The animal rights organization is seeking $250,000 in damages, as well as a formal apology from US Airways CEO Doug Parker, Captain Chesley "Sully" Sullenberger, and first officer Jeffrey Skiles.

Horowitz added, "if a deal must be made, we can do without the apologies."

In related news, a major cereal company announced special honorary packaging of one of its popular breakfast cereals, in honor of the Flight 1549 crew. Instead of the legendary "Wheaties" box, however, the crew will grace the fronts of economy-size boxes of "Shredded Tweet."

FMI: www.peta.org, www.usairways.com