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Wed, Apr 01, 2009

Commuter Airline To Remove Seats From Short-Haul Flights

Hey... It Works On The Subway... Right?

It works for a number of other transportation systems... so may be it will work for aviation... so says a unique program instituted under FAA guidance by a small New York based commuter carrier looking to build upon its rep as a low cost flyer.
 
The latest round of cost cutting is forcing Manhattan Airlines to remove the seats from its commuter aircraft. The resultant 'volumetric adjustments' will allow as many as 20% more passengers to board per flight.

Harold "Harry" Yarmpitz, CEO, said that, "Manhattan has always been at the forefront of commuter airline technology. We have great hopes for this program."
 
The key technology being utilized is the subway strap, using aviaion grade materials and TSO'd by the FAA. Just as passengers are required to buckle up now, they will instead be required to hold on to a subway strap during takeoff and landing. Yarmpitz noted, "The FAA wrinkled their noses at the first whiffs of our proposal. But; we showed them over 216 studies conducted by their sister DOT agency, the Federal Transit Administration (FTA) that showed subway straps to be just as safe as seats in the event of an unplanned stop." It was also noted that obese persons will become desirable rowmates in contrast to being loathed as they are today.

"Just think, in the event of a sudden stop, wouldn't it be better to bump into a squishy person-of-generous-mass than to bump into an airplane seat with all its hard surfaces and corners?" added Yarmpitz.
 
Its not about changing the way people commute, its about changing the way people think about transportation. Yarmpitz said, "Studies showed that our customers will feel more at home with this kind of setup. After all, most of our customers will take the subway from the airport to their office hanging on to a strap all the way."

FMI: www.manhattanstrapsyouin.com

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