Also: NASA Makes List, Checks Twice, Clears Santa Claus For KSC Landing

Aero-News has learned that after several months of negotiations -- with plenty of paperwork flying back and forth between Washington and the North Pole, along with a few "naughty" accusations against unnamed FAA personnel -- Santa Claus has been given unrestricted access to the nation's airspace.

"Santa can now focus on making his list and checking it twice, without the hassle of government paperwork," said DOT Secretary Norman Mineta. "Thanks to this agreement, the only time he needs to worry about Red Tape is if he wants to use it to wrap presents."

We can only assume that Santa passed all security requirements necessary for the unfettered flight access -- good only for a 24-hour period ending December 25 at 6 pm. EST.

Mineta said the decision was helped by a flood of public comments offered by Santa advocates from all over the nation. Thousands of letters were sent to the Department of Transportation and to the North Pole encouraging each party to complete these important negotiations before Santa's yearly trip, he said -- almost as many as have been sent in by pilots commenting on the Washington, DC ADIZ.

"Santa's Elves are tough negotiators," Mineta noted. "But, in the end, we were able to arrive at an agreement that will benefit children of all ages."

There are, however, unconfirmed rumors St. Nick still won't be allowed to land at Potomac Airfield.

"Now it's just HO HO HO and off I go," exclaimed the Jolly Old Elf, in a voice that sounded suspiciously like Mineta's with a cold. "The reindeer and I look forward to checking this item off of our list for good."

We're unsure what specific item Santa was referring to. Our best guesses have something to do with an end to user fees, a sub-$100K Cirrus, and an immediate ban on interminable teleivison news coverage of landing gear problems in commercial aircraft.

And while such a jovial attitude in an airport terminal would be considered most unusual this time of year -- and would likely arouse suspicion with TSA screeners -- it's not expected to be an issue for St. Nick as he's a general aviation guy.

In a related story, NASA has announced the space agency (which, officials added, has been really, really good this year) has come to an agreement with the North Pole to permit Santa Claus and his reindeer exclusive use of the Kennedy Space Center's Shuttle Landing Facility on Christmas Eve.

This makes the third time this year that NASA has opened up its facility's long runway for private use. As was reported in Aero-News last week, NASA announced it will allow the GlobalFlyer aircraft to take off from the facility on its attempt to break the record for the longest-distance flight ever.

In a public statement, Sir Richard Branson -- sponsor of the GlobalFlyer project -- asked Santa to just remember that NASA promised he could use the runway first.

During Santa's brief stop at Kennedy on Christmas Eve, said NASA, the Jolly Old Elf hopes to take an up-close look at the facilities that will help return humans back to the moon, and eventually on to Mars.

"We also hope Santa has some extra-special gifts for NASA this year," said an unnamed NASA spokesman. "A new, safe, really cool-looking manned spacecraft brought in under budget would do it, although we'd also be happy with an assured soft landing for the Stardust probe."

"Santa has often said he envies NASA's beyond-Earth-orbit journeys," said Ima Elf, lead engineer in Santa's workshop, to NASA. "He prefers traveling with his reindeer, but Santa has great interest in NASA's space vehicles. He can't wait for humans to be stationed on the moon so he can make his first legitimate visit there."

While NASA hopes Santa will be extra kind to them this year... ANN is wondering just what that spokes-elf meant by a "legitimate" Moon visit. Those with any information on any of Santa's illegitimate trips to the moon are encouraged to email rob@aero-news.net.

(Editor's Note: The above is ANN's twisted take on two actual press releases issued by NASA and the DOT during this, the merriest of seasons, and does contain actual statements by both agencies... as well as our purely tongue-in-cheek observations. It is our hope the reader will take all of the above in appropriate good humor. We also actively encourage Santa to give Potomac Airfield's David Wartofsky a break, he's had a rough year. Happy Holidays!)

FMI: www.noradsanta.org, www.dot.gov, www.nasa.gov